![]() ![]() You chose to come here, you chose to talk - to belittle my vocation - just as you chose to become a pickle. You seem to alternate between viewing your own mind as an unstoppable force, and as an inescapable curse, and I think it’s because the only truly unapproachable concept for you is that it’s your mind - within your control. "Rick, the only connection between your unquestionable intelligence and the sickness destroying your family is that everyone in your family - you included - use intelligence to justify sickness. Rick: -end, Morty! Season-nine more seasons, Morty! Nine more seasons until I get that dipping szechuan sauce! For 97 more years, Morty! I want that McNugget sauce, Morty! I just took over the family, Morty! And if you tell your mom or sister I said any of this, I'll deny it, and they'll take my side because I'm a hero, Morty! And now you're gonna have to go and do whatever I say, Morty! Forever! And I'll-and I'll-I'll-I'll go out and I'll find some more of that Mulan szechuan teriyaki dipping sauce, Morty! Be-because that's-that's what this is all about, Morty! Th-th-that's my one-armed man! I'm not driven by avenging my dead family, Morty, that was fake! I-I-I'm driven by finding that McNugget sauce! I want that Mulan McNugget sauce, Morty! That's my series arc, Morty! If it takes nine seasons, I want my McNugget dipping sauce szechuan sauce, Morty! That's what's gon-what's gonna take us all the. Your mom wouldn't have accepted me if I came home without you and your sister, so now you know the real reason I rescued you. Rick: I've repla( belches)aaced them both as the de facto patriarch of your family, and your universe. He threatened to turn me in to the government, so I made him and the government go away. Welcome to the darkest year of our adventures! First thing that's different: no more Dad, Morty. Morty: OK, take it easy Rick, th-th-that's dark. You wanna know why, Morty? Because he crossed me. And sometimes your sister, and sometimes your mom, but never your dad. You heard your mom, we've got adventures to go on, Morty, just you and me. I don't care what you do! You just gotta get it together! Get your shit together. And if you gotta take it somewhere, take it somewhere, you know? Take it to the shit store and sell it, o-or put it in a shit museum. ![]() Morty: Well, then get your shit together! Get it all together and put it in a backpack-all your shit, so it's together. Morty: Summer, he's happy! I'm happy! I-I-Is that why you're doing this?! You don't want me and Rick to be happy?! I'll see you motherfuckas at the dance! Tiny Rick! Tiny Rick: Well, Summer, I hear Toby Matthews isn't into psycho chicks. The fact that you're old, the fact that we're all going to die one day, the fact that the universe is so big, nothing in it matters-those facts are who you are! So you're trapped in there and you can only come out in the form of Tiny Rick's teen angst! But those bad thoughts are the real Rick. Summer: Grandpa, I think that when you put your mind into this body's young brain, it did what young brains do-it shoved the bad thoughts into the back and put a large wall around them. That's how alien I am! And even I'm sitting here listening to the two of you and being like, "WHAT THE FUCK!?!" So good luck with your shitty marriage, and tell Rick I'm sorry he has to deal with EITHER of you. I'd laugh but I'm biologically incapable. But you know the reason why I ripped my chains out of the wall? And do you know why I'm never coming back to this planet?! BECAUSE THE TWO OF YOU ARE THE FUCKING WORST!!! You both hate yourselves AND each other!! And the idea that it has ANYTHING to do with Rick is laughable. At the same time, Rick's motivation to cure my disease was not to save my life or anyone else's, but to patent and sell the cure for billions of Blemflarcks. However, I am also carrying a highly infectious disease that I suppose you could call "space AIDS" as you put it, and Rick did chain me up so that he could attempt to cure it. Second of all, cards on the table, I'm a murderer that eats babies, and I came to this planet to eat babies. Me and Rick and Morty running around, and Rick and Morty time. ![]() Rick and Morty and their adventures, Morty. We’re the only *URP* friends we’ve got, Morty. We’re gonna- do all kinds of wonderful things, Morty. And together, we’re gonna run around, Morty. But if you stick with me, I’m gonna accomplish great things, Morty. ![]() Because the world is full of idiots that don’t understand what’s important. And you’re gonna keep your mouth shut about it, Morty. And then we’re gonna go on even more adventures after that, Morty. And I needed those seeds real bad, and I had to give them up just to get your parents off my back. ![]()
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